An Open Letter To Chris Evans!
Today it was announced in People Magazine that Chris Evans wants to move on from acting once his Captain America role has been wrapped up. Unfortunately that will still be a few years away and from his tone I sense his red white and blue undies are blazing to get it over with. Now why might you ask is he in such a hurry to be finished with something where he obviously holds such great talent? The answer is he wants to direct. This is an open letter to Chris Evans.
Listen Chris, I’m not saying you shouldn’t direct. If you’re listening at all, I’m telling you to follow your dreams. At one point you wanted to live in the woods and I fully supported you in that venture as well. I for one am greatly looking forward to your directorial debut, 1:30 Train starring yourself and Alice Eve. Which by the way, if you are done with acting maybe cast someone besides yourself in the lead role, but I digress. I’m writing this story to remind you of some of the great pieces of work you’ve done outside of Captain Rogers, the Man with the Plan.
*Not Another Teen Movie–You started off your career on an iffy foot at best. Not Another Teen Movie is a satire based on basically every single Molly Ringwald movie from the 1980’s. No really, every one of them. The character’s are transparent at best and Evans, you were no different. But you pulled it off without a hitch. I saw this movie opening weekend over 10 years ago and I still remember “Jake” like it was yesterday. The movie was campy, hysterical, but campy. The good thing though, is that you showed range. You sang and you danced and not many actors get to toss a hat trick into the ring the first day out the gate.
Puncture–This is a movie for a true fan, a true story. It’s hard to find and almost harder to watch but not due to your talent. The subject matter revolves around the disease known as AIDS and two struggling young lawyers trying to make a difference. Well, maybe they weren’t trying in the beginning but they are throughout the rest. Your character was a mess, a drug addict who could barely focus. However when you find out about safety syringes that could keep hospital employees, like one special nurse you’ve met who has contracted AIDS, from getting stuck by needles that contain potentially deadly diseases you become intrigued. The news that hospitals won’t even allow the inventor to show them to staff due to a GPO sets you on a path towards atonement. You would were going to fix the situation and yourself along the way. A true whistle blower story that ends in a way no one saw coming.
*The Iceman–This is probably my absolute favorite character you have played. Sure it wasn’t a huge role but it was different and sometimes different is good. Mr. Freezy the ice cream man with the plan. Plan to kill anyone in his path that is. The evil side of you shined like a copper penny in sunlight however there was still an air of humor in everything you said and did. The long hair didn’t hurt either. You were this whacked out serial killer version of Tony Stark inventing different prototypes of murder weapons (use this spray to pretend you sneezed on the guy, should kill him within seconds). And you pulled it off without a hitch. I’m scared of you Chris, I really am. And the scene where you wear the really tight shirt in the disco club and dance through the crowd, pheels Chris, pheels.
Snowpiercer–Alright I realize we haven’t seen this yet (and the trailer has a lot of asian character subtitles) (Update I saw it and it is undoubtedly one of my FAVORITE movies in the world) but it’s an important project to you and we’re here for you. It’s been a bit of a long road. It’s based off a graphic novel which many don’t realize though I don’t trust to talk about that since “canon” and all. I will tell those reading that it is about a future where the majority of life has been killed off by a failed global warming experiment. A group of people are living on a train called the Snowpiercer and have created a class system. Historically speaking, class systems never work out in anyone’s favor. But who knows if this will even be the way it goes (ya’ll remember my Extremis Huffpo embarrassment) so I shut up now. Moving on you worked hard on the movie and now it’s being platformed. Hey, don’t worry. We’ll keep an eye out and make sure that the cities will be sure to pack those theaters and stick it to the man and this wide release will happen. Don’t worry Curtis is safe with us.
So Chris, we realize you want to get behind that camera and I for one support you. But keep in mind, there is more to you than just Steve Rogers. You’ve done some great things in your career and I hope we’ll see more. Sometimes a selfish fan can admit that it is disappointing to lose our favorite actor to the backside of a camera. Or the woods.
*I’m a member of the Netflix #StreamTeam. Some of the movies above can be found on Netflix Streaming and are marked with * symbol. Take a look for yourself.