Garage Sale Stories: Excuse Me He’s Peeing On Our Stuff
So we held a garage sale on Saturday. I know what you’re thinking so keep it to yourself. It was so much work for little reward. I mean we did make some money but even better I have stories. So many stories to tell you about weird garage salers. Why are people so weird?
A friendly man shows up and chats with me about the many items I’m trying to sell. He sees I’m trying to sell a Magic Bullet Express and jumps on it. He then tells me about how he bought one at another garage sale and once he got home it didn’t work. He was very upset that when he went back to the woman’s home to return it, the neighborhood was gated so he couldn’t get back inside.
My opinion is that a garage sale is buyer beware. I certainly don’t think you should knowingly sell anything broken at your yard sale but if by chance something gets by, it’s buyer beware. Never should anyone show up at your home at a later date to make a return.
I had one woman try to give me the shakedown. Luckily I’m Lee and I’m a bad ass so puhleeze. She told me she wanted to purchase my entire bin of boys t-shirts (which were marked 50cents each) for a set price as long as I did not count them out first. The odd part was that she wouldn’t tell me how much she was going to give me. I explained that I would first need to count out the pieces but then I’d be happy to do a deal with her. She wasn’t happy with that. I told her that the clothing was moving pretty quickly and the day was still young to which she rudely replied “So you think.” She kept forcefully repeating that she only wanted to make this transaction if I wouldn’t count out the shirts. But if she was going to pull one over on me, it was going to be because I was bad at math and not because I felt bullied or in any way threatened.
A family showed up nearing the end of our garage sale and stayed quite a while looking around and going through the bins of clothes. It was a husband and wife, a teenage boy and a tiny toddler. They spoke Spanish so I was not able to understand the majority of their conversations. They picked out quick a bit of clothing they wanted to buy and a few other this and thats. Their toddler also picked up two Mickey Mouse stuffed animals, one of which he was holding and one he handed off to the teen. They both walked a bit away when the parents came towards me to pay. I counted all of their merchandise and the total would be about $7. They held out in front of them $3.50 worth of quarters and said “$3.50 por favor, g*d bless.” To which I responded. “No. But I’ll take $6 and that doesn’t even count the two stuffed animals your kids have down the driveway.” They acted put off but the father went back to his car and rummaged around for what felt like an hour for more loose change to pay off the rest of his debt.
My mother’s opinion was that when you run out of money, you go home. I had no problem cutting them a deal but they were aware their kids had stuffed animals and they were still asking for a quite a slash in garage sale prices. Also, leave out the g*d bless if you don’t mind. I don’t need g*d making me feel guilty for selling Mickey Mouse stuffed animals for profit at my garage sale. We’re both good people here in this situation for the same thing. I need some money, you need some things. Let’s play the game fair and everyone leaves happy.
The best story though comes from the couple who brought their dog to the garage sale. You could tell they’d been out all day buying things and having a good time. When they pulled up they let the dog out, on a leash luckily, and allowed him to run all over our yard and our neighbor’s yard. He immediately took a huge steaming crap, but luckily the gentleman had bags for just this situation. After that was said and done he came back up the driveway with the dog in tow. This made me nervous as a slew of never before marked items just begged to be pissed on as far as I was concerned. And get pissed on it did. His dog lifted his leg on one of my kid’s toys to which I shouted “Excuse me he’s peeing on our stuff!”
The guy acted completely surprised as if this had never ever happened in all his dog toting garage saling life. He looked at his wife and said “Uh, I guess we bought that.” He asked me how much and I told him $10. Well surprise, he only had $4. Yep, you just happened to only have $4 on you when you’ve been doing this all day? When you were just looking at all the things we had for sale? Whatever dude. It truthfully wasn’t worth the fight because the toy was hard plastic so I just cleaned it. They bought something, it wasn’t the end of the world.
But in Tim’s words “The fact that they had the audacity to allow their dog to overrun our yard and our garage sale…” and Tim doesn’t usually have words, so it’s a big deal.
This was my Saturday. Now I have a ton of stuff to put up on the local garage sale Facebook groups and Craigslist sites. It seems like so much work and it is, but it’ll make a great profit. Every year I say I’ll never do it again but I will, I know I will.
Do you have a crazy garage sale story? If so leave it here, please, outdo mine!